and we were all on it

I'm fairly certain I nearly died earlier this week because I got mad at traffic and decided the rules didn't apply to me anymore. The scene evolved thusly: I was driving home from Harrison Hot Springs. There was absolutely no traffic on my drive there earlier that morning, so I was confident there wouldn't be any on the way home, either. All was well until I got to Abbotsford.

"Why don't I have a listen to the traffic station," I said to myself at that time, turning on the radio. How smart I would feel, discovering if there were any accidents or delays so I could adjust my route accordingly. It turned out that was a smart decision, because lo and behold, there was an accident on the highway I was on, in the direction I was going, several exits ahead of where I was.

"I'll exit early," I said, quite pleased with my intelligence, "and take a different way and miss all the traffic!"

But hey, guess what. Everyone else was also listening to the traffic station, and everyone else decided to exit early, and if you're not taking the highway home from Harrison Hot Springs, there is only one other road you can go on. AND WE WERE ALL ON IT.

There was a point somewhere in Langley when I was stuck behind a Wide Load hay truck or something. It was going so slowly that I'd morphed from Good Driver to Angry Driver with my body positioning. (When Angry Driver is at the wheel, I slouch down and put my left foot on the dash beside my steering wheel, and rest my left arm on my knee. Coincidentally, the same position as Casual Driver.) Then the Wide Load hay truck decided to do the rest of us a service and kind of pull over, but not quite, so it was halfway in the lane and halfway on the shoulder. The two cars ahead of me zoomed past it, and I started speeding up to do the same.

It wasn't until I was ever so slightly over the yellow line that I noticed another truck heading towards me, in the opposite lane. What I should have done then was slow down and stay in my own lane, and wait for the oncoming traffic to cease so I could pass the stupid slow hay truck. But I was TOO MAD. I wanted to go FAST. So I kept going! I veered some more over the center line and it wasn't until the hay truck was immediately to my right and the oncoming truck was immediately to my left that I began to wonder if there was enough room for the three of us.

And there was! But there probably shouldn't have been. Probably I should have died. From now on, I should pay better attention to stuff when I'm mad. Or else I have a Ministry of Magic Car! Now you're all jealous.