cougars ruin everything

The sun came out today. It's been weather from a Jane Austen book for the whole week, so when I saw the sun I gasped and ran to my car and drove to the beach. It was wonderful and peaceful, and I was quite enjoying myself until I had a sudden flashback to a staff room conversation from Friday.

Teacher 1: "There's more cougars on Vancouver Island than anywhere else."
Teacher 2: "I know what you mean. When I go for a walk with my son in the forest, there is no distance between them and us. They watch us."
Teacher 1: "They like the little guys. They can pick you up and climb up a tree no sweat."

I know I'm not a little guy objectively speaking, but relative to a cougar? I don't know! I've never seen a cougar in real life! Maybe they're three times the size as me so to them I am a little guy! So then my wonderful morning at the beach was ruined, and I had to convince myself not to run to my car, lest there be cougars about and all they were waiting for was for me to give chase. Sometimes my penchant for eavesdropping gets me in trouble.

Last weekend I had the best pork ever to exist in the world, and I got the recipe but the recipe called for a crock pot. So yesterday I bought a crock pot, and this morning I plopped all the pork inside, and mixed up the ingredients for the fantastic sauce. You know how when you're making something wonderful, you want to smell it while you're making it? I smelled it, and that was a mistake. That may be because there is cider vinegar in the sauce, and that stuff smells disgusting, and also it could be because I was supposed to use chili sauce but I used sweet thai chili sauce instead. I hope it works! I am so concerned.

Report cards are due on Monday. Guess what I'm doing today? Not report cards! Because I finished yesterday! I am totally a report card pro now. Starting on Monday I get to teach English 7, which I am SO EXCITED ABOUT, and also I get a prep every day, which I am EVEN MORE EXCITED ABOUT. It's going to be amazing.

when I look at you i feel wee tadpoles jumping in my spine

Report cards are due on Monday. So naturally, I watched another musical.

11. Brigadoon (1954) - Gene Kelly, Cyd Charisse. Lord have mercy, the accents. The ACCENTS! I love a good Scottish accent (love, love, love), but this whole movie was an accent debacle. Did they not have diction coaches? I know such a thing existed at that time, because I saw two in Singing in the Rain.
     Anyway, the plot is this: two dudes from New York end up in this magical, secret Scottish town (Brigadoon, if you will). One of the dudes is Gene Kelly, and he falls in love with this lady from Brigadoon, Cyd Charisse.
     What I liked was the beginning, which was like an enchanted, misty, romantic Disney movie, complete with slow-motion sunshine spreading over a foggy land and a chorus of people slowly singing "Brigadoon." Also, the scenery was lovely, and there were HIGHLAND COWS! I love Highland Cows. They look so chill and charming.

     They also did a really good job juxtaposing Brigadoon and New York, and including song flashbacks to convince Gene Kelly that he knows where he belongs. (Normally, I have no qualms about spoiling things because I like to have things spoiled - movie things, I mean - but I don't want to spoil it for you because unless you know what happens, it is a bit of a shock. I gasped aloud!)
     What I did not like was the atrocious accents. Also, the whole town is shrouded in mystery, and there is this one scene where Gene Kelly and Cyd Charisse are dancing and picking flowers. Gene Kelly sees some a bit farther away, and he tells Cyd Charisse, and she FLIPS OUT and is all, "NO! Don't go any further! There's nothing over there!" and then runs away. Gene Kelly is torn between chasing after her, or else seeing what she was so scared about that was a bit further away. I understand this, but it turns out that instead of doing either one of those things, he falls down a hill and sings about love. Dude, come on. I can't find out what is going on until you do, so GET IT TOGETHER.
     Once I got past the accents, however, I mostly liked it. Especially because of how the ending was so satisfying, and also the cows.

life before google: a short story in comic form

Random coincidence: I found the comic I was looking for for this post without even meaning to. Now you should look at the comic, and then go back and read the part of that post that refers to the comic, and we can all smile about how stuff works out.

instead maybe i should read a book

Today was spent writing mid-terms. I mean, I was writing the mid-terms that the students are going to write in a week. I was listening to dramatic instrumental music on my computer at work, watching the darkening sky out my window, and I felt very content. Like, I could do this kind of thing for a long time. In second block, my grade tens and I spent most of the time chatting; I have to give them up next week because they're a one-semester course only. Sometimes I have moments where I feel like a poster for BEING A TEACHER, and today was one of those moments.

Before I go to bed now I play a computer game about fish, where I match things to get points and then use points to build an aquarium. Sometimes I don't have enough points to provide my fish with all their comfort requirements, such as a heater and a filter, and then I feel bad so I race through the levels to get more points so my fish don't have to suffer. I think it's about time for a real pet.

the subtle grace of gravity, the heavy weight of stone

I go through phases on this grand adventure of mine. Sometimes I am confident and independent and amazing, but then other times I am shy and lonely and feel like I'm five. I don't know if it has anything to do with the weather, or maybe cycles through the week depending on if I'm in teacher-mode or alone-in-apartment mode, or if it's something else. Right now, I'm lonely. I feel like I don't know anybody here, and I've been here for so long but haven't really done anything or made any progress in any aspect of my life. I miss my dog that died. I want hot chocolate and a big stuffed animal, but I've already brushed my teeth and I didn't pack any stuffed animals.

it'll take me at least a week to dig up all my dolls from the cemetary

All within the past two hours I guzzled down a giant cup of juice, and then a giant cup of gingerale, and then a moderately-sized cup of milk with my cake. (The milk was with my cake; the rest were independent of the cake.) And yet, I am still thirsty! I feel like the roof of my mouth is leaking saliva to quench my throat's bizarre, desperate need for moisture.

Meanwhile, I watched another musical.

10. Meet Me in St. Louis (1944) - Judy Garland, Tom Drake. This one was pretty good, except for something that was actually completely terrible. There's this one scene where the little sister comes in screaming, claiming that the boy that Judy Garland likes hit her and knocked out her tooth and caused her to get stitches. The whole family freaks out, and Judy Garland goes over to his house and punches him for attacking her little sister. But then, you guys, it turns out that the little girl was LYING, and instead he actually SAVED her after she pulled a prank that almost KILLED a bunch of PEOPLE. She gets found out, and doesn't feel bad at all, and everybody laughs about it and nobody punishes her!
      Other than this scene, I liked the movie, but I hated that scene almost so much that it completely ruined the movie. Anyway, it's about this family who lives in St. Louis when the World Fair comes, and the two oldest girls are in love (one with a boy in New York, and one with the next door neighbour), and then the dad gets transferred to New York and everyone is devastated, and then the little girl pulls a dangerous prank and tells a HORRENDOUS lie and everybody laughs, and they don't move after all.
      There were some good things, though: Judy Garland has a lovely voice, and I liked that she fell in love with the boy next door, only he didn't notice her at all, until she enacted a scheme to get him to fall in love with her back, and it totally worked. That never happens in real life! It was nice to see something I always wish to come true come true.

i outsmarted myself and i don't even mind

Today was a snow day. Not really a legit one, because an hour after I called all my students to tell them the whole thing was off, I drove to school and didn't even die. Now it's 5 degrees and the sun is shining, but it's too late to take it back!

I was very productive - I went to school and marked a bunch of stuff, because I hate marking and never want to do it after a whole day of teaching, then I went to the library, and then I came home and watched a movie. Then I noticed that my apartment is really messy, and simultaneously decided I wanted cake. So I said to myself, "I'll mix up the cake and put it in the oven, and while it's baking I'll clean my apartment!"

Everything mixed up okay, and then I started picking things up from the floor. Then my body was like, "Hey wait a minute, I'm still sick over here," and I felt light-headed. So I got some juice and sat on the couch and went on the internet, because hello, I'm sick, and a sick person can't clean an apartment. So now I have cake and I didn't even have to clean anything.

they are also all wearing pants

Driving home from work in the snow gives one a sense of accomplishment. "Check out how good of a driver I am!" one might say, after successfully backing in to a parking spot after acing the treacherous roads. "I'm amazing." (That's just what I said, except I said it to myself because there was nobody else around.) Then, when I was walking into my building, there was this lady trying to sweep snow off her van with a push-broom, and so I helped her. After that I felt like Superman! Sweet driving skills and an altruistic gesture. Fantastic.

Then I reclined on my couch because working all day after previously sleeping all day is HARD. I made it through my classes with lots of juice and tea and Vicks, but at the end of the day I felt a bit light-headed and I think I'll go to bed soon. Meanwhile, I watched another musical.

9. Guys and Dolls (1955) - Marlon Brando, Frank Sinatra, Jean Simmons, Vivian Blaine. This is about gambling, two guys and their respective dolls, and various secrets and misunderstandings. The first thing I noticed was the odd lack of contractions in much of the dialogue. They will alternately say, "ain't got a grand," and "cannot believe they will not take your marker." It was very distracting, and caused me to dislike the movie until Marlon Brando and that lady went to Havana. Then it came about that I can definitely see why he had dozens of illegitimate children - that man is CHARMING.
     What I liked was the beginning scene, where they showed how sleazy the city was in a fantastic dance sequence, and the costumes, and the romance between cad Marlon Brando and innocent Jean Simmons. Of course she reformed him, but he reformed because he WANTED to. Before that could happen, though, there was a terrible misunderstanding and they got in a fight and it wasn't his fault but she blamed him and I felt so bad for him! Jean Simmons, how can you fight with him? He is so charming!
     What I did not like was the lack of contractions - it sounded SO WEIRD. Internet movie trivia tells me that it legitimately copies the writing style of the original author, so I guess that's cool. But it drives me bananas. Also, don't watch Marlon Brando's mouth too closely when he's singing - apparently all his songs had to be mashed together from a bunch of takes because his singing voice was somewhat sub-par, and he doesn't seem to know how a singer moves his mouth.
     Something confused me, however. They sang a song about gazing into each others' eyes and seeing love and how wonderful that was, and it reminded me of a quote from The Sound of Music: "Nothing's more irresistible to a man than a woman who's in love with him." But then, you know all those other movies where the boys are in love with girls who won't give them the time of day, and girls fall for boys who are big jerks? Which one is real life? That's what I'd like to know.
     I am starting to regret my thirst for movie trivia. While looking into this one, I found out that Frank Sinatra was insanely jealous because Marlon Brando (who never sang before) got the title part, so he called him "Mumbles" behind his back! That made me sad. Come on, Frank Sinatra - can't you see how freaking CHARMING he is?
     Overall, I liked this one. It's a good story, and you will not regret investing your time in Marlon Brando.

i shall be a ditch-digger who once had a wonderful day

I have too much time on my hands today. I just ate soup and toast, and planned Math and Socials for tomorrow, and also watched another musical! I loved it. I've been re-watching the penultimate scene over and over again, because I love it so much. It made me smile between my hacking coughs.

8. Hello, Dolly! (1969) - Barbara Streisand, Walter Matthau. This one is actually not a musical about a musical, surprisingly enough. The plot is a bit confusing: there's this awesome lady named Dolly Levi, who can do all sorts of things, and she has THE BEST WARDROBE OF ALL TIME. Seriously. I looked for pictures to include here for you to gaze upon, but they were all in black and white. Sad face. Anyway, she is somehow involved in the life of this crotchety gentleman, Walter Matthau, while simultaneously being in love with him (secretly). She helps his niece elope with the niece's boyfriend, and then also helps his two store clerks escape to New York and fall in love with pretty milliners, and then at the end the two of them fall in love. How they get from A (dislike) to B (marriage) is unclear, but nevertheless, that is what happens.
     What I liked was the lack of misogyny, and her incredible wardrobe, and how pretty she is, and her lovely voice, and the "Hello, Dolly!" song with Louis Armstrong! I re-watched that scene about five times because it's so wonderful and happy. Louis Armstrong sings his part with the most giant smile on his face, it is physically impossible for you to watch it without smiling.
     What I did not like was how the plot wasn't very strong (how did they fall in love? Oh, they just did? Oh, okay.), and how apparently Walter Matthau hated Barbara Streisand so much that he REFUSED to kiss her at the end, so it was just a tricky camera angle that made it look like they were kissing! How could anyone hate Barbara Streisand?
    Regardless of those minor infractions, nobody is really a jerk in this one (how refreshing!), and her dresses are PHENOMENAL, and she is so lovely. Also, there were so many wonderfully cheeky parts, like when one old guy comes in in the middle of a song and says, "I'm sorry, son, I came in late" and he sings the part of the song he heard, and the crowd fills him in; and also when Barbara Streisand is singing good-bye to Walter Matthau, she starts out in this weird, dramatic, fabulous way, and then tells him to stop interrupting her after he gives her a strange look for singing in such a manner. And if for no other reason, you should watch it to see Barbara Streisand and Louis Armstrong smile at each other.

i'm too sick to come up with a title

8:15am -

The sun is cracking through the clouds. This is good; I was worried I'd have to stumble to the doctor's office in the dark. Usually I'm at work at this time, so I can't remember what the sky normally looks like at 8:15 in the morning. I feel like today is going to be epic and strange, and all my students and the staff are going to be all, "OMG WHERE IS SHE?????" but honestly, probably that will not happen. More likely the staff will see the TOC in staff devotions and inquire as to who she is in for, and then say, "Oh." The students will eye her as one would eye an unknown animal when they walk in the classroom, but then become accustomed to her and like her better than me. :( (That's the grade sevens, only, though. My older kids probably won't even notice it's not me.)

I'm dressed in my go-to-doctor's outfit under my covers in bed. It's cold outside.

11:00am -

I thought the clinic opened at 9, because apparently I was calling a different clinic inside a different Wal-Mart than the one I intended. I inspected the toothbrushes in the toothbrush aisle that was beside the clinic for 15 minutes and then figured out I was too early, so I drove around Campbell River for 45 minutes because I didn't want to go back to my apartment. The skies were lovely this morning, you guys. Then the doctor told me it was viral, and I just have to get over it. Then I went shopping, and this is what was in my cart:
- raspberry pop tarts
- eggs (for making lemon pudding)
- 2 cans of juice
- 1 can of soup
- a big jug to make juice in
- a new kind of tea
- honey for said tea
- echinacea

I'm eating a pop tart right now. It may have been a mistake. Just like the cheesies yesterday were a mistake also. I shouldn't be allowed to go shopping when I'm sick.

3:00pm -

I've been busy - I watched a movie, and then had a nap. I actually had a nap during the movie, and then thought I should relocate the nap to my bed, and once I was in bed I wasn't tired anymore. Then I finished my book, and if I was at work my work day would be over now, so I feel like I should do some prep for tomorrow. I mean, I definitely need to do some prep for tomorrow, because I have no idea what I'm teaching my grade eights in the morning, or what we'll do in Socials in the afternoon, so I need to do some stuff.

And thus concludes my first ever sick day as a teacher. Ta-da. (That's what I say to my students when I've finished teaching them something. It makes everything very exciting.)

Dear Howard Keel: I hate you.

Today I am sick. Well, I've been sick for a while. Yesterday, I did a bunch of dishes and then I had to take a nap. This morning I woke up and swallowing felt weird. Tomorrow, which is Monday, which is a work day, I am going to the doctor and then going back to bed. I called in my first ever substitute teacher! It's very strange.

Anyway. After I did some prep and stuff at school, I went to Save-On and this is what I had in my basket:
- 2 bottles of Gingerale
- 3 cans of soup
- sherbet
- yellow cake mix
- cheesies
- caramel rice cakes and also plain rice cakes

 Meanwhile, I watched another musical. I hated it.

7. Kiss Me Kate (1953) - Kathryn Grayson, Howard Keel. This is another with the plot of a musical within a musical, except this one spends way too long with the pretend musical. Usually they show snippets, but this one shows a whole act, which got really boring. It's about this ex-husband and ex-wife who do Taming of the Shrew in musical form together, and in the midst of it they fall in love again and then fight again and then fall in love again. I didn't really like any of it.
     What I disliked was Kathryn Grayson's singing voice - it was wobbly and opera-ish, which I do not care for. Plus, I do not think I will ever watch another Howard Keel musical again, even though I have two others waiting for me. He seems to be synonymous with misogyny; in Seven Brides for Seven Brothers he was a big fat jerk, and in this one he actually SPANKS and humiliates her on stage, all because she got mad at him after she discovered that a nice note he gave to her was actually supposed to be given to his OTHER girlfriend. So yet again, he is completely at fault, and yet the woman takes all the blame. BOO HOWARD KEEL. (I should have known, though - the title screen of the DVD had an image of her over his knee mid-spank. I said, "Uh oh," but continued on nonetheless.)
    Skip this one. Howard Keel sucks. And if you wait the whole movie for him to blow up in a horrible, stage-related accident, you will be disappointed.

he knowses his toeses aren't roses

What I do now, after a long day of teaching exponents and ecosystems and road rules and 1 Chronicles to a bunch of kids who don't want to learn about any of that stuff, is come home and watch musicals. I was never particularly fond of musicals before, but ever since a friend introduced me to White Christmas this Christmastime, I love love love them. Now I watch them all the time, and I will tell you what I think about them because I know you care deeply for my opinion.

1. White Christmas (1954) - Bing Crosby, Danny Kaye, Vera Ellen, Rosemary Clooney. I've already talked about this one a lot, but I will say it again: I love it. LOVE IT. Plus, even though it says "Christmas" in the title, it's totally not a Christmas movie until the end, so you could watch it right now. My favourite parts are Rosemary Clooney's face and how she smiles and also her singing voice, and how high the mens' pants are, and Danny Kaye's voice breaking when he's propositioned, and watching Vera Ellen dance.
       What I dislike is how there is a misunderstanding and nobody TALKS about it, so Rosemary Clooney goes off in a huff for nothing because if she'd just SAID something to Bing Crosby before she took the train she never would have had to break up the act. I also dislike that I always get the "Sisters" song stuck in my head. Plus, isn't it weird that somebody's name is Bing?

2. The Sound of Music (1965) - Julie Andrews, Christopher Plummer. I'd seen this one loads of times, but my mom got it for Christmas this year, so we watched it again, and I liked it even more since I like musicals now. My favourite is when they sing about what are they going to do about Maria, and then she runs in frantically because she's late, and then she sees them, freezes, sighs, and stomps off. I do not like the song the old nun sings, or the fact that Christopher Plummer was a jerk for the whole time they were making the movie, or that the movie is not at all what happened in real life.
      Also, even though I dislike him personally, I enjoyed Christopher Plummer's singing voice, and then I found out it wasn't even him! One negative thing about me liking musicals is that initially I thought everybody was so talented, but then I discovered that in fact they are NOT talented, they just steal someone ELSE'S talent and dub it in as their own. Now I'm cynical; tonight when I was watching The Band Wagon, I was looking at the lady dancing and I thought to myself, "She's probably not even doing that dancing herself."

3. Seven Brides for Seven Brothers (1954) - Howard Keel, Jane Powell. This one was completely stupid. It is about this stupid, giant, cocky, mountain bear man who goes into town one day and is all, "I need some sugar, and a shovel, and some cheese, and a wife!" The people at the store are all, "Uh, we don't sell wives here." So he goes through the streets singing about the qualities he would like in a wife, which are of course, being pretty, and slim, and a good cook, and willing and able to do all the chores. He finds some girl who meets all the criteria, but first he's like, "I'm not going to marry her unless I like her cooking!" so he tries her stew and likes it, and proposes, and she accepts, and then she finds out that really he just wanted an un-paid servant/maid for all his stupid, giant, cocky, mountain bear man brothers. She's actually pretty cool, though, and flips the breakfast table over on all of them for being jerks, and they start to like her.
        Then they decide that they should go into town and steal women to be their wives, so they do, and the women scream and cry and faint whilst being absconded, but guess what happens? THEY FALL IN LOVE. With the stupid, giant, cocky, mountain bear men who STOLE THEM FROM THEIR BEDS. Plus, a bunch of other stuff happens that prove the original guy to be pretty much the worst man ever to exist, but somehow it comes about that his WIFE is the one who has to apologize. Plus, all the songs are stupid. This is the worst musical ever. Do not watch it. (The Dutch title is the only good thing about it: "Zeven bruiden voor zeven broeders.")

4. Singin' in the Rain (1952) - Gene Kelly, Donald O'Connor, Debbie Reynolds. I love this one. What I've been noticing is that a lot of musicals are like behind the scenes movies about making musicals, where they not only sing and dance in the musical they are pretending to film (the meta-musical, if you will), they also spontaneously burst into song and dance in real life. This is about Gene Kelly is a silent movie star who is in a fake relationship with his co-star for publicity, but she's not a very nice person and he secretly hates her. (Not secretly, actually - he tells her all the time.) Then he meets Debbie Reynolds, who makes fun of him and so he falls in love with her. Then movies start coming out with sound, so his studio freaks out and tries to turn Gene Kelly's newest silent movie into a sound movie, but it's a total disaster, until Debbie Reynolds and Donald O'Connor save the day. It's super awesome. My favourite is when he sings in the rain, and how awful the mean girl is, and Debbie Reynolds' costumes. I do not care for the fact that apparently Gene Kelly was a big fat jerk in real life. But you still should watch this movie! It's great.

5. Once Upon a Mattress (2005) - Carol Burnett, Tracey Ullman, Zooey Deschanel. I rented this from the library because I was looking up musicals and it came up and I thought it sounded neat. It was okay - I like the old musicals better because of the dancing and the costumes. (Although the costumes in this one were pretty spectacular.) It's like the princess and the pea story, with Carol Burnett as the weird mom who makes it impossible for her son to get married, and then there's this lady, Zooey Deschanel, in the court who needs to get married because she is pregnant, but nobody can get married before the prince does. So she sends her boyfriend to find a princess who will pass the queen's insane test, and he brings back this crazy princess from a swamp, who is actually awesome.
      I loved Tracey Ullman in this, and all the ladies had amazing hair, and the princess was great. I disliked Matthew Morrison's face and hair, but luckily he was not in it that often. Plus, there was a weird part at the end when the king got his voice back and he was being a jerk to the queen - even though she was a jerk to him first, I did not like it. I wish people would stop being jerks. You will probably be okay to not see this one.

6. The Band Wagon (1954) - Fred Astaire, Cyd Charisse. I watched this one because when I was looking up trivia on Singin' in the Rain, there were lots of comparisons about Gene Kelly and Fred Astaire, who were apparently buds with super different dancing styles. Also, whereas Gene Kelly was not always the nicest person to be around, apparently Fred Astaire was super awesome, so I wanted to see him in something. It was a little weird in this movie, because he looked so much older than the girl he was kissing, and he seemed so out of place in the movie with his high pants and his small head. Although, they might have done that on purpose because one of the points of the movie was that he felt too old to be in musicals and he used to be famous but people forgot about him.
      What I liked was to finally see him in something, and watching him dance because he is awesome, and also Cyd Charisse in all her different personalities that changed with her costumes, and her white skirt that was my favourite. I disliked when they kissed at the end, because it was really awkward and I looked it up and he was 54 when they made the movie and she was 32! Which isn't so bad, not like she was 19, but they looked so far apart in age that it was weird. He was born in 1899, you guys! Before the 1900s! I know obviously people were born before the 1900s. But still. This one was not my favourite, but it was still pretty good.

Now you're all caught up on my opinions. Stay tuned for more! I got to borrow a bunch from a friend before I came back after Christmas break, so I've got tons waiting to be critiqued. Just you wait.

at least there's jello at the end of this story

Today was one of those that required all the strength in my bones plus more. It all started last night, you see. I was dead tired at 8:30 (Tuesdays tend to do that to me), so I optimistically crawled into bed and shut my eyes. Instantly I fell asleep, which was wonderful, but at 12:30 I woke up that kind of waking up where you are ZAP WIDE AWAKE. The second my eyes opened I began to worry about not finishing one of my Math classes on time, and teaching another class everything they need to know in time for the FSAs, and not knowing if I'm teaching English next semester, and if my gums were receding fast enough for my two front teeth to fall out, and about calling parents about interim reports, and so on. It's like it was gnawing at every synapse in my brain and I couldn't shut it off, even by counting.

I decided it was useless to try and fall asleep, so I turned on the light and read for a bit, and then I decided to take a shower because I was going to take one in the morning and if I took it at that time it would save me time in the morning. (Since sometimes showers have a wakening affect, I agonized over this decision from the moment I decided to throw off my covers to the moment when I put a towel over my pillow so my hair wouldn't soak through my pillow. But I did it anyway.) Then I perused the internet for several hours, then I read again, and then at 4:30 I fell asleep.

Then I had to wake up at 7 for work, and instead of going to staff devotions like I have done every single morning since I started, I sat at my desk, drank my coffee, and listened to dramatic instrumental music. Each of my five classes was something not quite agony, but a little bit less than that. Then I trudged to my car, went home, and had some jello.

nothing to declare except my genius

Two ways in which I was a genius today:

1) I wore new boots to school, and didn't notice until I got in the building that they made farting noises each time I stepped because they are a tiny bit too big and my foot was slipping around inside. One cannot wear farting boots around high school kids, so I folded some paper towels into make-shift insoles, and ceased the farting. GENIUS.

2) I was teaching the grade nines about the difference between (-4) and -4 in exponents, and suddenly it came to me to explain it thusly: "When the negative is inside with the number, it's inside the hug of the brackets, so it sticks together and that is the base. When it's not in the brackets, it is not being hugged together with the number." They proceeded to repeat my brilliance in a mocking tone, but I didn't care because when they are writing their tests it's all going to come back to them because of the hugs. GENIUS.

It's currently snowing. They called for snow, but I never believe them; today it appears that I should have believed them. It's really fun to watch from the windows, so a few times in each class today we stared out the window at the snow. (More fun would have been playing in the snow, but then we come into the trouble of throwing snowballs and going to the principal's office.)

baby step to four o'clock

This morning I departed from my mainland home, to embark on the long  journey to my island home. The terminal was fairly empty, as it usually is when I make a reservation in anticipation of it being busy. I went in to get coffee, and all the dudes behind the empty food counters looked aggressively bored. Each stared at me in a lazily challenging fashion as I passed - You want to give me something to do? Well, do ya? The Rocky Mountain Chocolate guy shoved a tray of fudge in my face - SAMPLE, MISS?!? I declined because he was somewhat terrifying, plus it was a bit early in the day for fudge. (Nevermind the fact that I sometimes have cake for breakfast.)

After coffee was acquired, I hurried back to my car, lest the ferry depart thirty minutes early and without me. Then, as I drove up the ramp, I worried I was accidentally going to Victoria; then, as the sun blinded me, I worried I would accidentally drive into the ocean instead of onto the boat. Now I am sitting in a row by myself, with the exact location of my car written on my hand, and the captain just assured us all that we are indeed traveling towards Nanaimo. I can't worry about anything else for approximately two hours, so I think I will read my book.